Reality vs Fantasy

 The title to my blog is ‘why isn’t life like a movie’ and my plan was to post on all the different reasons why it’s not. Explore the idea that life happens and not everything goes how you plan it. And In the end that’s ok. I had to break it to myself that I’m not always going to have a happy ending. My Prince Charming isn’t necessarily going to come galloping in on his white horse and sweep me off my feet. 

There are so many more movies and series on Netflix and amazon etc which are actually a lot more realistic nowadays. They highlight important issues which happen in the world everyday. And even though they can be hard hitting and difficult to watch, it’s vital that writers and directors introduce us to narratives which are closer to home. And give an overall clearer view of society. 

I know we all love a bit of escapism and I myself am a sucker for a good cheesy romcom where I can see Zac Efron with his top off. Which is something I’m doing more so recently because of all the doom and gloom that I read everyday or see on the news. I have to give myself a break from hearing about all the messed up things going on in our world, otherwise I’d drive myself crazy. Even if it’s just for an hour or two a day where I can sit and forget about all the horrors.

This is a bit of two way street that I’m trying to come to terms with if I’m completely honest. I say that because one part of me needs to know what’s happening in the world I live in, and I want to educate myself. But then I worry about my mental state if I engage too much with it. So, then, I surround myself with fictional worlds which give me false hope, and make me dream of a better life. It’s such a hard position for all of us to be in. And we are pretty much all in the same boat. So what’s the best thing for us to do to? 

Do we shut ourselves off and hide away from reality? Or do we face it head on? 

Who knows what the best way is right now. I hold my hands up and say I have absolutely no idea. And for some people it might be easier and they’ve managed to find some peace amongst all the craziness. If you have I’d love to hear your thoughts. If you haven’t, we can get through this together. 

I don’t want to always be so negative. So we need to find a way to look at the positives that can come out of 2020. Recognition and reward for all the key workers, which never should have been neglected in the first place. Maybe the Earth  has actually benefitted and had a well deserved break from us humans polluting it.  Also, it’s shown that there is kindness amongst us and we’ve come together in a time of crisis. We’ve learnt not to take things for granted, our family, our friends, our health, the NHS, our planet! 

 Can you say you are coming out of the other side of lockdown a different person? Or the same person but with a new outlook?

For some it’s been the worst time imaginable. Despair, loneliness, anxiety. 

So reality vs fantasy. Which road do we take?  

At the end of the day, we are all different people. We all have thoughts when we wake up in the morning and when we go to bed at night. Our brains work in mysterious ways. And what works for one person to give some kind of relief, won’t work for another. You have to find your own way.

You find your own escape and own method of coping. And I hope that you all do find it. But I think the best thing is to have a happy medium. Don’t have too much of one thing and not enough of the another. Have a middle ground. Have the strength to figure it out. Life is for making mistakes, failing and succeeding, being happy and being sad.  But the one thing that gets you through is having a drop of hope. The hope that something amazing could happen for you or just that things will get better. Because they will. You just have to ride it out till it does.

For me, I’ve hidden away for too long. Bathing in fantasy. Losing direction. But I’m coming out of the other side of that. At the beginning of lockdown I watched the news everyday and got so absorbed in it. It wasn’t healthy. So then I decided I would ignore it instead, sweep it under the carpet. I went from one extreme to the other. 

I now know that they weren’t the best ways I could have dealt with what was going on. 

But I’m not going to give myself a hard time and regret what I did, it’s what’s I thought I needed at the time. And I don’t think any of you should regret any ways you chose to deal with such a unprecedented time. But you can learn from it.

I’ve most certainly learnt that the answer to my problems doesn’t lay at the bottom of a bottle of Chilean Merlot. And that maybe I need to stay off the vino for awhile. Getting wine drunk and crying at soppy love stories isn’t going to help me right now. I need to ground myself and come to terms with the fact that things are slowly changing. I’m back at work and I’m done being lazy. 

I think during lockdown I began taking pages out of my cats books and napping for 80% of the day. 

My mind is working in different ways now. I’m up and down, left and right. All over the place. I’m in some kind of limbo and I really don’t know which direction I’m going in. I’m currently watching the Riverdale series for the third time. It’s comfortable and familiar. But I know it’s not exactly the best thing to do. To keep getting caught up in these made up stories. But I’m tired, I’m tired of this world and everything happening in it. I’m trying to find some silver linings and something to look forward too. Some hope and some light. Am I the only one feeling this way? 

I seemed to have lost some of my inspirational talk. I’m being pushed in all directions. I don’t know where I am and that’s scary. I’ve come to a point in my recovery now that is making me feel uneasy. I’m feeling a little bit lost. 

I’ve come so far, and like I’ve said in previous posts, my experiences have enabled me to try and help others. I’ve overcome every obstacle that I’ve faced, and I’m hoping this one will be exactly the same. 

This is where I find that happy medium. This is where I surprise myself yet again. I’ve got to give myself some credit, and I’m shocked that I can even be honest about these things and express it to you. That’s big. It’s huge actually. 

I need to get myself focused again. And if you feel the same I know it’s easier said that done. But it takes just one day, and one step. As soon as you start and get yourself in the right frame of mind, and how better it makes you feel, then you’ll never stop. And you’ll never look back. Don’t get obsessed, but just do what makes you feel good. Look after yourself physically and you’ll feel the results mentally too. Happy body happy mind. And that’s exactly what I’m going to do. Join me won’t you.